


Reamers and Zesters and Whisks, Oh My!

by WolfAndHound_Archivist



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Humor, Post-Sirius in Azkaban
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-05
Updated: 2016-02-05
Packaged: 2018-05-18 09:54:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 680
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5924065
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WolfAndHound_Archivist/pseuds/WolfAndHound_Archivist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sirius explains the uses of kitchen utensils to Harry.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Reamers and Zesters and Whisks, Oh My!

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Lassenia, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [Wolf and Hound](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Wolf_and_Hound), which was created to make stories posted to the Sirius_Black_and_Remus_Lupin Yahoo! mailing list easier to find. However, even though I still love the fandom, I am no longer active in it and do not have the time to maintain it. To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in December 2015. I posted an announcement with Open Doors, but we may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on the [Wolf and Hound collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/wolfandhound/profile).

Harry eyed his godfather cautiously. “Sirius, why did you want a zester and a reamer?”

Remus sputtered, his throat struggling with tea that suddenly went down the wrong way.

Sirius ignored him and, with a straight face, explained why certain utensils are so important. “Zesters and reamers, like a lot of other tools, provide very specific functions. Let’s start with zesters. You use them to peel off strips of the top layer of something; a fruit, let’s say. You press firmly against the form of the fruit, following along the curves and outlines of its body, over every slope and plane of its flesh. This allows you to gather long, aromatic tendrils of your desired fruit, which are then used to provide additional flavor to your dish, or may be purely ornamental to provide pleasure to your eye. The trick with zesters is to use a long, sure, steady stroke at precisely the right angle.”

Remus swallowed audibly, staring into his mug.

Sirius continued. “Now reamers are something altogether different. You start with a ripe, inviting fruit, one that’s beautifully mature, rounded and full-fleshed, firm but yielding to the touch. A fruit packed full of sweet, flavorful juices. Juices with an intoxicating scent and a savory taste that simply cry out to be released in a sudden, glorious cascade.”

Remus snatched up the Daily Prophet from the table and held it up, open, in front of his face. Sirius raised one sinuous eyebrow. “Moony, didn’t you say not five minutes ago that you had finished with the paper?”

“I just remembered that someone was quoted saying something. I wanted to find…Might write a letter to the editor…” He turned a page.

“Hmmm. Anyway, Harry, as I was saying. Once you’ve chosen your fruit, you open it into two halves, exposing its tender, but most inviting, center. For instance, if you cut an orange cross-wise, you’ll see a small, round opening right in the center of that succulent fruit. A hole that positively invites the attention of the reamer’s tip.”

A wheezing cough ruffled the pages of the Daily Prophet. 

Sirius went on, his voice smoothly resonant, his speech slow and deliberate. “The hard tip of the reamer is gently inserted into the hole. Then, slowly, steadily, firmly, you grind the reamer, bit by bit, deeper and deeper into the fruit. As the tip pushes further in, start slowly twisting the reamer back and forth. The flesh of the fruit envelops the reamer, encouraging its passage as far in as it can go. The sides of the reamer rub hard against the soft tissue, releasing all those wonderful juices the fruit holds captive deep inside of it. The hand not holding the reamer, gently but firmly cups the fruit with the warm center of the palm. And, as the action of the reamer vibrates through the fruit, the other hand helps out by squeezing and molding the fruit to fully embrace the reamer.”

A low, humming reverberation emanated from the depths of the newspaper to accompany the rest of Sirius’ explanation. “Do this and you will be rewarded with all that luscious juice pouring out, a heady flood of the essence of the fruit, dripping warm and sweet into whatever receptacle you have waiting. I admit, I’m usually a bit sloppy and end up licking the stuff off my fingers.”

Remus slapped the newspaper onto the table, his eyes wide and glowing gold at Sirius. “Are you quite through?”

Sirius regarded him thoughtfully, and then, with just the hint of a smile, said, “Harry, do you want to know about whisks?”

Remus sprang up from the table. “That’s it! I’m going to take a shower.”

As his hurried steps receded down the hall, Harry couldn’t quite hide his grin. “Gee, Sirius. You think he’s okay? He seemed a little…ah…fevered.”

Sirius gravely agreed. “I noticed that, too. I better go see if he’s alright.” Rising, he looked back over his shoulder at Harry. “Weren’t you planning on going to The Burrow today?”

“I’m on my way. See you later.”


End file.
